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As I was looking at my facebook news feed this morning, I saw a post that caught my eye.  My girlfriends grandmother had posted a link to Big Hollywood.  The post titled ONE YEAR GONE: President George W. Bush Answered the Calling of Our Time.  Hopefully with one year removed from presidency with “The Distance of History” working for President Bush, our nation can truly understand that he was protecting our freedom.  Without question, each president has had their flaws and errors during their terms, yet with time these flaws fade into the background and the more historic events seem to shine through.  The history books 100 years from now will not teach our children how Bush mispronounced Nuclear, but instead how our freedom got attacked and we did not stand for it.  We waged an all out war to make sure it did not happen again.  Please read this great article here and take ten minutes to listen to the video linked into the post. ONE YEAR GONE: President George W. Bush Answered the Calling of Our Time

NBA All Star weekend fights a good fight with baseballs All Star weekend as the top ranked.  Sorry Pro Bowl, but when I think of an NFL All Star game I think more in the mind set of NFL Blitz of NFL Street.  It is just to hard for All Stars to showcase their talent individually on the grid iron.  Ok, back to the NBA.

Over the years NBA all star weekend has taken many different shapes.  From non NBA venues (Vegas and this years held at Cowboy Stadium) to many different events.  Its hard for a basketball fan to not find something they enjoy.  Yet here is where the problem lies.  There are so many events going on, that aside from the all star game, everything else is done half ass.  The dunk contest comes in a fair second followed by the three point contest, yet there is a huge drop off after that.  Who really cares about horse, The Rookie Sophomore Challenge, The skills challenge, and the shooting stars.  Nothing says lame like watching Sasha Vujachic, Lisa Leslie, and an over weight Magic Johnson square up against Bill Lambier, Chauncey Billups, and some chick from the WNBA.  LAME….

After a lot of though, ok well a little, I have come up with a plan to help the NBA fire up its All Star Weekend.  Starting at the top of my list is none other than the All Star Game.  Four minutes into the game the announcers will say “These guys will not start getting serious until the last five minutes of each half.”  Yes, that does sound like a typical NBA game, but would it not be great to see playoff like intensity from start to finish?  The same intensity you and your friends play with when going head to head, East vs West on the playstation.  There is a simple solution to fix this.  The NBA should take a page out of Baseballs book.  Winning team for the All-Star game gets home court advantage in the finals.  I am sure this would raise the level of intensity and defense for this game.  It would be great for the league and suck only for the team with the best record in the NBA.

The Slam Dunk Contest has the ability to be mind blowing, brilliant, or super lame.  Over the years this has been the even that has changed more times than anything.  The lowest point was the advent of that stupid dunk wheel.  When you think of Slam Dunk contest what do you see?  Mj v Dominique, Vince, or Spud?  All great performances.  When the dunk contest was an infant, the games best high fliers entered.  The last two years Dwight spoiled us, and now this year.  Bust.

Nate Robinson (Does not want to be in it)
Shannon Brown (Will win it)
Eric Gordon (Plays for a JV team in Los Angeles)
Demar Rozan (Canada will not care)
Gerald Wallace (Did he used to be that athletic guy on the Kings?)

I am sure all of these guys are great dunkers.  Nate has won it, Gerald Wallace got close, and Shannon knows how to fly.  Yet put this field of contestants against the 1985 contest and it is a joke.

Jordan
Ervin
Drexler
Wilkins

In one contest you had four of the best dunkers from the 80’s.  When you think of best current dunkers, who comes to mind?

James
Howard
Smith
Wade
Nate
Shannon (sorry there is my Laker Bias)

Now that would be a sick contest.  Yet, LeBron is too cool for school.  Howard has paid his dues.  Smith, well who knows?  That leaves us with Nate.  Nate Robinson should be punched.  In a very recent article he belittled the slam dunk contest.  Upon many quotes the ones that stick out are followed here.

“And I guess, hopefully, I mean if I don’t win it, it’ll be good because I don’t want to go back no more. But if I do [win], and they want me to go back again, I guess so. Keep going until I lose,”

“I was hoping so,” Robinson said of James’ possible participation. “It would be good for the fans and the NBA, pretty cool to get him and some other big names in it, but those guys are All-Stars, they don’t need to waste their time doing dunks and stuff like that. They’re right where they need to be, which is All-Stars playing Sunday.”

So what are you saying Nathaniel?  You don’t want to do the dunk contest?  That looks great for the NBA, having guys in the contest that don’t want to be there.   Why hate on the dunk contest?  Without the dunk contest no one outside of New York and Washington would know about you.   What about LeBron?  I think he was scared of you jumping over him.  He did not want to have to sick Mr. Knight and Nike on ESPN to confiscate all footage of this existing.  Did Jordan, Dr.J, Clyde, Wilkins, Bryant, Carter, and Spud all waste their time as well doing dunks for the contest?  I don’t buy the fact that it was a waste of time.  I think the biggest reason LeBron wont do the contest, because he is scared.  It is out of his hands for him to win, and in the judges hands.  He would not want to skip out on a post dunk press conference because he was a sore loser.  Yet who knows.

Ok, so that was enough of a roast for Nate Robinson and LeBron.  Now the big change.  I say have a nation wide dunkoff.  The winner of this gets to be the final contestant in the dunk contest.  Any every day guy, dunking on the same floor as the pros.  Now that would be sweet.  I am still waiting for an NBA guy to one up “The Air Up There” with the 720 dunk.  Any other creative ideas?    Stay tuned for the rest of All-Star weekend

If you become a professional athlete do you lose the ability to think at a fifth grade level off of the playing field?  So many “Big Timers” (remember that group?  What ever happened to them?) these days for some reason can not function at a fifth grade mentality.  Present any fifth grader with the following situations and I am positive the vast majority will answer the question correctly.  It brings new meaning to the phrase “Are you smarter than a fifth grader?”

Say hello to my little friend

THE GILBERT SITUATION:

Aside from special forces and cops, would you ever think of bringing a gun to work? What would happen if you did?  Yeah, you would probably be taken away in the back of a squad car with cuffs on.

OK, so you did not want to have the guns around your kids, I applaud Gilbert for thinking of his family.  Yet, if you are not going to have the guns at home to protect yourself, then why have the guns at all?  At least you thought the situation was funny.  Were you thinking of your families well being, with all of this income you are about to lose?

PLAX

As a resident in the state of New York and a professional athlete, you know the gun laws.  The fact that you shot yourself and ended up in jail, well I hate to say you deserved it.  Carrying a gun, not to mention a loaded gun around with you in NYC is like downing a handle of Jack and then doing donuts in your local police departments parking lot.  Yeah, its not to smart.  So you were afraid of getting jumped.  Hire security, its not like you can’t afford it.  I bet one less trip to the Gentlemen’s club a week will cover the cost.

Vick and his IQ

You are a professional quarterback.  You are well liked by your fans.  You are a baller worth millions upon millions.  How can you be so dumb to have buildings, kennels, and remains of dog fights in your backyard.  If you are going to fight dogs, at least do it off of your own property, and cover your own ass.  (Not saying its ok).  You are asking to get caught having these on your own property  Its like walking through an airport with a bag of weed.  Wait, you did that as well.  Hmmmmm not much going on up top, is there?

No mulligans for marriage

TIGER, a CHEETAH

Yes, you were the first athlete to ever make a billion dollars.  Yes, you are the greatest thing that happened to golf.  Yes, you messed up.  I think the problem around you is there are two many yes men.  A man of Tigers, stature has many people helping him. It is Tigers team . I am guessing these guys are probably so afraid of Tiger that they can’t say no to him.  My question to Tiger, I am sure there are many more women that are not coming forward in which you had sex with.  Did you really think you could get away with this?  How many more are there?  You have a super model as your wife and more money that you know what to do with.  You have kids, and you are selfish.  Way to screw up your perfect reputation.   Isn’t golf supposed to be a gentleman’s sport, not a gentleman’s club?  Way to keep it classy.

Nice neck wrinkles

McGwire paging captain OBIVIOUS

“I swear it is nothing but Creatine and Andro.”  Mark, I think it is common sense that when you put on 75lbs of muscle, there is something else.  The fact that you did not get caught, well you were lucky.  The fact that you acted like such a pansy when you came out, well it was funny to watch.  Really when you came out, you were just reinforcing what we all knew.  And the record now goes back to Aaron.  Maybe Marc Echo can brand an asterisk on your record breaking baseball.

Yes the list could go on and on.  I could write thousands of these.  Who is next?  Eli or Payton Manning?  Dwight Howard? Derek Jeter?  Who ever it is, I am not surprised.

It was raining in Los Angeles today, I did not have to work, and yes I watched Ellen.  Anyhow check out these boys, unreal twin brothers who are 10 years old.  I think they might be the next big thing.   Fast forward the video a min and 30 seconds to get to the song and dance.

The summer of 2010 is starting early.  You may or may not be aware but the NBA trade deadline is quickly approaching.  The most popular topic on the table is none other than Los Angeles’s Andrew Bynum for Chris Bosh.  As crazy as this sounds it is possibly the best possible scenario for Toronto, and a for sure upgrade for Los Angeles.  I can see the rest of the league going into a frenzy already.  I can see the small markets blaming it on a conspiracy.  Yet, let me point out why the odds are this will happen.

As we all know this upcoming summer in the NBA is a big one for free agents.  Bigger than it has ever been.  This summer has been hyped up for the last two years.  Some of those names on the table include LeBron, Wade, Bosh, Stoudemire, Dirk, Ming, Howard, Chandler, etc.  The list is long and good.  With this upcoming summer we all know that Bosh is going to bounce from Toronto.  Who would ever want to play up there?
With Bosh leaving on his own terms Toronto gets nothing, zero, zilch, nada.  Currently, of the available big men in the league who is the best scenario for Toronto?  Andrew Bynum.  Bynum recently has been on a tear with Los Angeles due to the absence of Gasol and the injury to Bryant.  He has shown the league, if he is the featured player on the team and everything is run through him he can bang with the best.  Yet in a star studded operation when Los Angeles is healthy, he is a streaky player, with a lack of intensity at times.

On the other end, would it be good for Los Angeles to trade their young up and coming center?  One the few true centers in the NBA.  I say yes.  The biggest thing Bosh has that Bynum does not is the ability to spread the floor on the defensive end.  Along with his shooting range is the ability to get up and down the floor quickly to defend against the smaller teams that seem to give the Lakers lots of trouble with the pick and roll.

If the Lakers do land Bosh, what are the chances he signs for another year?  If Los Angeles lands Bosh, they will sign him to a 5 or 6 year contract.  Any where else he is looking at 4 to 5 years.  He will get that extra year which will make him bank.  He will also be playing along side Kobe, Gasol, Artest, and Odom.  Who would not want to play in that line up?  Finally, coming from Toronto to Los Angeles, he will not be able to leave the sunshine.

As a Laker fan, this trade is a win win. If it does not go through well, we still have a great young center.  If it does, we get an upgraded version.  Among other things this trade could stop the summer of 2010 before it ever begins.  There are rumors left and right that LeBron and Bosh will be a package deal to a team like Chicago, New Jersey, or New York.  LeBron wants to play with a legit big man.  If Bosh is gone, I bet LeBron stays in Cleveland and signs a 1 year contract.  This will force the Knicks to hold out yet another year.  If this happens where will D-Wade go?  Dirk will not leave Dallas and the summer of 2010 will come and go.

Bynum Stats

Bynum Stats

Bosh Stats

Bosh Stats

Today is probably not the best day to drop this post.  The Lakers last night got shredded into chewing tobacco, rolled up into a ball, and placed in Tim Duncans lower, side, and upper lip last night (thats called an around the world in chewing terms).  Lets face it, that is what people who wear Spurs aka Cowboys along with people from San Antonio do.  LA’s jerseys should not have said Lakers but a more fitting name like SKOAL, KODIAK, or COPENHAGEN.

I am a bit on edge today and could possibly benefit from a dip, but I dont feel like shitting my brains out and getting nauseous afterward so I am going to do it in this blog.  Let me reiterate the title of this post. MARC STIEN IS A DAMN FOOL.  Marc Stein has gone on ESPN and crowned the San Antonio Spurs the team of the decade.  Along with Stein was Forbes, but that is a whole different blog.

Honestly what are these people thinking?  How can you truly claim the Spurs are the franchise of the decade?  Don’t numbers and championships speak loudest?  Below is a quick look at the numbers from the past decade.  We will leave the regular season out because we all know nothing really matters until the playoffs.

Playoff Appearances:

Team A -9    Team B-10

Finals Appearances:

Team A – 6 Team B – 3

Championships:

Team A – 4 Team B – 3

Head to head playoff record:

Team A – 18 Team B – 8

So what does this say?  Team B was very consistent making the playoffs all 10 years, they were also a perfect 3-3 in the Finals.  Team A did miss the playoffs only one year so the edge goes to B for this one.  Team A did not win the Championship each time they played yet they did win 4 and made it to the finals twice as many times as Team B.  If you look at the head to head matchups team B was owned by team A.  I bet you can’t guess which team is which?

Now my rebuttal to what is going on in your mind right now if you are not from Los Angeles.  CONSPIRACEY CONSPIRACEY CONSPIRACEY.  Then NBA wants big market teams in the finals.  Thus the Lakers were gifted various playoff series against Sacramento in which they should not have advanced and possibly did not have the better team.  I laugh each time I hear this argument and to this day still hear Sacramento bitch about officials and officiating.  I ask them one question?  Did the ref’s pass the ball to Robert Horry at the buzzer?  This was the moment of truth for Sacramento and they failed.  Assist Divac, time to go to Sac with a tied series.  Plus lets be honest, if the Kings did make the finals it would be Sacramento and New Jersey.  Yes New Jersey is a big market but that is like the Clippers making the finals.  It would be up there with the Phillies and Rays.

The Lakers are a big market team and the Spurs are a small market team thus we deem the Spurs more successfull.  I do not understand how this makes a franchise better?  If you want to play in front of a big market move your team.  Money is money in a big or small market and there is a sallary cap in the NBA.  This could be the worst excuse I have ever heard.  Yet this excuse is a great reason to prove the previous conspiracy wrong.  If the NBA wanted big market teams in the NBA Finals how did the small market Spurs make the finals 3 times?  Enough said.

All I am saying is that Marc Stein along with the rest of ESPN (Eastcoast Sports Priority Network) needs to stop hating on the West Coast.  Tune in next time to see how biased ESPN really is.

Guilty, I am a phone whore. Ever since I got my first phone, the Nokia 5110 with the changeable face plates, I have always wanted bigger and better. This trend continued all throughout high school, college, and into the present. I am sure my parents hated me for this. Rarely did I keep a phone for the allotted two year contract that all the evil providers make you sign. Anyhow this is all just a side note leading us to the point of my post.

I have had the BlackBerry, the I-Phone, and even a Nokia phone that had a built in radio back in the day. Now I want the latest and greatest. For the past four months we have all seen those lame ass droid commercials. I am presuming most of you are thinking the same exact thing I was each time those DROID (robot voice) commercials came over the air waves. “This is going to be Verizons and LG’s Attempt to unsuccessfully match the I-Phone.” As we have seen so far well it is. But, the cool thing that came with the Droid was the platform, the computer behind the phone. It lets you do anything and everything.

Google Nexus aka I-PHONE killa

Google was smart enough to get behind this technology and go forth with their latest and greatest. The Nexus One. They took the best platform in the cell phone world and combined it with the most popular phone out there. This is the I-Phone on steroids. Imagine all the stuff you hate about the I-Phone. Well Google took that and made it Googleness (a word I just coined meaning the best, unreal, awesome) because that’s what Google does, well minus Blogger, sorry all you blog-spotters out there, wordpress is still king.
Anyhow, check out this page CLICK HERE and tell me you do not want to go to AT&T right now to cancel your service, sell your I-Phone online, and buy the I-PHONE killa.

Who knows though, I could be totaly wrong though.  $330.00 and this phone is yours…..

The holidays jumped on all of us faster than Tiger Woods jumping on one of his many cocktail waitress.  With the holidays came many parties and lots of fun.  To kick off the holiday season I was taking a hot date to one of my buddies Christmas party.  Yet before any of my partying and swagger ever began I shot myself in the foot.   I have a buddy who lives in a new apartment in BH (Beverly Hills), before this party I have been to his place once and it was in the day.  On this particular night it was pouring rain, one of two storms Los Angeles sees every year.  All the apartments looked the same and I could not let my hot date walk in the pouring rain.  I was going for a very suave move attempting to pull into the garage, drop her off then go park the car in the rain.  It was a very gallant idea, like Chivas 1800 gallantry.   As I saw my buddies apartment garage door open, I swooped in.  I was thinking to myself, man unreal timing.  I am looking super fly.  This particular garage looked like every other garage placed underneat an apartemnt complex.  Big gate, concrete walls, and tandem parking.  After driving around the two levels of this particular garage me and my date noticed my buddies car was no where to be seen.  I quickly realized this was not his garage.

My personal jail

As I turned my car around to exit the garage, it quickly dawned on me that you need a garage door remote to leave.  Just picture the scene.  My buddy is waiting in his garage to let my hot date in, and we are no where to be seen.  Mean while my date sitting next to has changed her thoughts from Rico Suave to Rico Retard.  Me and my car are locked in this garage.  To make matters worse  all the food for the party was in my back seat.  There was nothing I could do.  I raised the white flag and started going into damage control.  I was like that caged animal that just runs around the same small space in a million circles.

I got out of my car and scanned the walls to see if there was an emergency exit button.  Obviously, no.  No emergency exit button existed.  Have you ever heard of an emergency exit button?  I was at a point where I was getting delirious and making stuff up, like the emergency exit button.  Ok so plan B.  I will just go up to one of the apartments knock on the door, and politely explain the situation and see if they can open the door for me.  As I attempt to do this, I quickly find out you need a key to get from the garage to the apartments.

I pulled out my cell phone to call my buddy, yet because I was underground surrounded by concrete, there was no service.  My game was a direct reflection of the cell phone bars I had, nothing.  Yeah, this night was off to a killer start.  As I was about to throw in the towel and start in on the party food, I heard voices.  No, not in my head but two men walking to their car.  They were arguing with each other.  I awkwardly interrupted them and told them my story.  They laughed, forgot about their qualm and opened the garage for me.

I called my buddy, gave him the spark note version of what just happened and made sure to pull into his garage this time.  The food, the girl, and my holiday season all arrived fashionably late.  I only hope that your holiday parties had this much random humor to them.

-CHAD  (my new pen name)
Note: There is a print link embedded within this post, please visit this post to print it.

New Years resolutions, what good are those things? How many times do people follow through with these resolutions? Well, I am about to find out. It has almost been one year now since I have been blogging minus a month or so. This whole time I have been hiding. I don’t know why, but something about being the man behind the mask was super cool. Batman is tits.
Yet as cool as Batman is, its time. Time to stop hiding behind the computer and characters that shape this far to difficult way to spell California.
Over the last year I have risen and fallen faster than the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, I mean Rays. I started in a fury, and then came the summer, laziness, lack of motivation, lack of material, new company. The excuses are long and lame. Yet excuses are like ass holes, everyone has them and they stink. No excuses here. I just was not inspired. Since this lack of inspiration it has been slow, and I mean real slow. I have made promises to you guys that I would not drop off, but I did. Yeah, I am that guy broken promise galore, well not really just with this blog. Why do people read blogs? Who knows. Why do I write? Well, this is where I have strayed off the path. I originally started writing my ideas because I wanted to. It was a way to see if people enjoyed my writing. It was a way for me to vent the random mishaps in my life. My buddy Zack at Lost Angeles inspired me to take my bogus ideas to the web. I did and I was decent. Not great but not bad. Then I slumped and slumped hard.
Like so many writers and blogs I got writers block and came up with nothing. Its like going to the gym. You have been working out hard for 6 months, you don’t feel like going one day so you skip. One day turns into a week, a week to a month. You get the picture.
Coming this New Year, I am going to let you in on my life and what it entitles. You are going to get to know the writer and “What makes him tick”. This is it for this year, lets make 2010 big, this blog is far to young to die. Its time to start from scratch. Stay tuned for the come back tour.